I had an idea in the shower today. I truly, honestly enjoy the beverage shenanigans of ornerymint, brilliant creator of the Homestuck cocktail collection. But I can’t drink without a good solid base in my tummy to absorb the booze and whatnot. So I thought to myself, “Why not Homestuck sandwiches?”
So I came up with troll sandwiches, and here’s the list I cobbled together. I tried to incorporate different aspects of each character as best I could, sometimes adding aspects of the lusus when necessary. They’re not perfect. But, fuck it. Sandwiches.
Aradia - Lamb Gyro. I haven’t got a whole lot of reasoning behind this one other than A: it’s a little exotic and B: she’s an Aries, so something with sheep. Yeah. But it’s still perfect.
Tavros - Roast beef on brown bread with lettuce, cucumber, and balsamic vinegar. Again, letting the sign do a lot of the work with the beef, the blood color coming up with the overall coloration of the sandwich, and a bit of Pupa’s green costume evident in the veggies.
Sollux - One slice of wheat bread, one slice of white. Inside, there is peanut butter, banana, honey (of course!) and blueberry and raspberry jam. Probably give you a sugar rush, to be honest.
Karkat - Crab salad, with some roasted red pepper hidden in it. On a claw-shaped croissant, of course!
Nepeta - Grilled chicken, sliced avocado, and baby spinach, sprinkled with
catnip oregano, on herbed foccacia. Kind of a stretch, maybe, but… um… cats eat birds, yeah?
Kanaya - Italian bread,
chainsawed sliced into rounds and lightly toasted, brushed with virgin olive oil. Top with a thick slice of fresh mozzarella, ripe tomato, and a dollop of pesto.
Terezi - egg salad and Frank’s Red Hot. Just dialing this one in. I am open to a better suggestion.
Vriska - 8oz hamburger, topped with 8 slices of spanish olive (to look like eyes), and with 8 pieces of bacon poking out of the bun like spider’s legs.
Equius - Foot-long roast beef sub (or garlic salami; in either case because I love you too much to suggest horse meat) with three STRONG cheeses (the boy loves his dairy) and some POWERFUL horseradish.
Gamzee - grape jelly on a toasted croissant, with a tall glass of WiCkEd eLiXiR.
Eridan - a single piece of fried whitefish on a bun, all alone.
Feferi - Fried calamari on a roll, with a side of marinara for it to swim in.
…. and that’s all I could think of. Anyone have any other ideas?